ARC's 1st Law: As a "progressive" online discussion grows longer, the probability of a nefarious reference to Karl Rove approaches one

Thursday, June 07, 2007

News Flash - Global Warming Has Severe Effects at Yosemite - Women and Minorities Most Impacted

This correspondent ventured into the wilds of the High Sierra and confirmed the disappearance of glaciers. What has been left in the wake of these vanished ice sheets are valleys thousands of feet deep, water falls and millions of trees. Al Gore has blamed the Bush administration and is again considering a recount of the 2000 election in Florida. Michael Moore has announced that he will be making a documentary, "The Attack of the Killer Trees." Green Peace is organizing a march on this former pristine wilderness to protest the evils of capitalism.

"What more evidence do you need to see the evils of our wasteful lifestyle run amuck?" Gore inquired at 97 decibels. "Bush has betrayed us yet again," the former vice president and prophet of the Global Warming Movement reasoned just prior to boarding his private jet ro London. His Nobel Peace Prize seems assured in the wake of this disaster confided a confidential source in Oslo.

Reverend Sharpton announced in New York that he was commisioning an ark for those likely to be flooded out in Bedford Styvesant and Harlem. "The Honkeys and the Jews will take care of themselves. We ain't having no New Orleans here."

In Congress new legislation was introduced to raise the cafe standard to 150 miles per gallon for all cars manufactured after June 15th. Another bill repealing the third law of thermo-dynamics will be introduced next week. It is rumored a committee is looking at the law of supply and demand with the aim of amending it further in the wake of the alarming developments in California.

*** UPDATE by St Wendeler ***
In related news, Global Warming linked to increase in feline birth rates. So, at least Global Warming is benefiting someone! Unfortunately for me, my wife has informed me that Global Warming decreases her interest in me - or something like that.

Your Co-Conspirator,
ARC: MontereyJohn