ARC's 1st Law: As a "progressive" online discussion grows longer, the probability of a nefarious reference to Karl Rove approaches one

Thursday, April 19, 2007

250 Bucks for Undercooked and Flavorless Barbeque

We truly are heading down the path to a more primitive time as the religion of Climate Change becomes more widely accepted:

Coming to a garden near you - the solar-powered barbecue
Last updated at 13:01pm on 19th April 2007

Green inventors have come up with an environmentally friendly solution to cooking alfresco - a solar-powered barbecue.

With forecasters predicting a long scorching summer for the UK, millions of us are expected to leave bigger carbon footprints by cooking over coals.

Green inventors have come up with an environmentally friendly solution to barbecuing - a solar-powered grill

But a new barbecue lets environmentally-conscious cooks enjoy grilling their food outside without feeling guilty about global warming.

The Solar-Grill catches sunlight with mirrors and beams it into its oven to cook food in a matter of minutes without smoke or flames.

To get grilling all a householder has to do is lift the lid on the shiny silver barbie, aim it at the sun and place the food inside.

You can then roast everything from steaks to vegetables and seafood without electricity, gas or coals and with no impact on the environment.

Food is cooked in the self contained barbecue oven and heated evenly from all sides.

The solar-powered grill allows environmentally-concious [sic] cooks to enjoy grilling outside without feeling guilty about carbon emissions

Its makers claim the Solar-Grill is also ideal for use in places where naked flames are forbidden or unsafe, such as balconies in flats and campsites.

CEO Rolf Schneeberger of Swiss makers Tammock Trading, said: "There's no smoke, no open fire and no pollution.

"It's a small contribution to saving the environment but we feel that with this barbecue we are doing our bit to help people be more green."

Environmental campaigners Friends of the Earth, said today that it was encouraged to see manufacturers becoming more innovative in using solar power.

Renewable energy campaigner Nick Rau said: "I think we've all got to take action on climate change in everything we do.

"We have this huge solar resource with so much potential for helping protect the environment, yet so few people are realising that potential.

"This solar powered barbecue is a very good example of how inventors are successfully tapping into that potential in more innovative ways. It's a sign of the times. [Indeed.]

"It's a very welcome step towards a better future and there's no reason why, despite our reputedly bad weather, that we should not be using technology like this in the UK."

He said that barbecues which run on gas or non-sustainable sourced charcoal are the most harmful to the environment.

He added: "There are ways to make barbecuing a reasonably environmentally friendly way of cooking, such as if you use sustainable sourced charcoal.

"This solar powered barbecue is taking that one stage further by making cooking outdoors even greener to the point where there are no emissions.

"It's a promising sign because if you are a person who likes the outdoors, then you should be even more aware of your carbon footprint.

"It's surprising when you find the same kind of people investing in patio heaters which are clearly an insane way of heating up the environment."
I like the outdoors... In fact, I bet I know more about the outdoors - and living in the outdoors - than this twit. However, that does not mean that I must eschew a campfire or a piece of charcoal to cook my food and warm my campsite.
Just in case the weather clouds over or you get caught out by the typical British summer downpour, you can continue cooking with the Solar-Grill using special odourless fuel tablets.

The alcohol based fuel burns without affecting the flavour of the food.

The eco-friendly contraption also boasts telescopic legs, which allow more adventurous alfresco chefs to set up and cook on uneven terrain. It is available online priced £125.
Ahhh, odorless alcohol based fuel!!! mmmmmm.... (Wonder how that alcohol based fuel is manufactured, packaged, & distributed. Would be an interesting question.

For the measly price $250, you too can cook using the Sun - and end up with flavorless and potentially deadly food! And there's nothing better than getting diarrhea while outdoors and on an extended camping trip. Want to talk about having an environmentally ...ummmm.... unfriendly footprint?

I should mention here that the day that we take cooking advice from the Brits is sure a sure sign that the Apocalypse is nigh...

And never mind the time that you'll be wasting by waiting for the Sun to cook your food - time that you could otherwise spend doing more productive things (like, say... planting a tree, etc, etc). No, the goal of the Environtalist movement is to revert our entire society back to the most inefficient way of life possible.

I think I'll keep my Liquid Propane gas grill (it keeps Hank Hill employed) and my vertical water smoker which is powered by charcoal, Apple and Hickory chunks of wood.

I doubt that the solar doohickey featured above could slow-smoke a nice pork shoulder

Or a couple of slabs of Mephis Dry-Rubbed Ribs.... ummmmm, ribs...

Sorry, have to go fire up the grill!!!

Your Co-Conspirator,
ARC: St Wendeler

Comments (2)
Brian said...

MMMM.. Are those... Rendezvous Ribs?

I'm in the land of seafood, so I haven't had much red meat lately.

BTW, I had that same solar grill when I was a kid, it was one of those Radio Shack Science Kit things, and I KNOW that my (our) parents didn't spend $250 on the thing.

It cooked a hotdog as I remember pretty well. Although it took a long time.

St Wendeler said...

Yes, if I recall, I had a couple of those warmed over hot-dogs that you prepared with the science kit. They were just slightly rare... which is fine for hot dogs, not so good for pork shoulder.

And yes, that appears to be a pic of some Rendezvous ribs... tempted to jump into the truck and head south for the weekend.