ARC's 1st Law: As a "progressive" online discussion grows longer, the probability of a nefarious reference to Karl Rove approaches one

Tuesday, June 21, 2005


In case you missed it, IowaHawk is back and poking fun of Senator Dick.

This is from 6/17, a small excerpt:

Mr. Hector Gutierrez
Gutierrez Bros. Landscaping
Arlington, VA

Dear Mr. Gutierrez:

Nothing could have prepared me for the shock that awaited as I exited the front door of my home early Wednesday morning, where I discovered that your lawn crew had cut a swath of environmental destruction across my yard so horrifying that it only can be compared to the Rape of Nanking. I can scarcely bring myself to describe the killing fields that are my North azalea beds and the brutal degradation and torture suffered by the bluegrass around the locust tree by the rear patio. I am writing to inform you that I have contacted the US Department of Interior to conduct a full independent investigation into Gutierrez Brothers' actions in this matter. Please be advised that you may be subpoenaed for records pertaining to mower height, pruning shear maintenance, and leaf blower emissions. I would also advise your crewmen to heed the lessons of the Judgement At Nurenburg: although they may be spared the justice due their superiors, "I was only following orders" is not an excuse.


Senator Richard J. Durbin
Washington, DC

Here's a post from yesterday:

Iowahawk Special Guest Commentary
Senator Richard J. Durbin (D-IL)

Okay, seriously, so help me out here.

So I get to the office this morning, pour myself a cup of coffee, and walk into the regular 8:30 staff meeting to go over the morning legislative agenda; you know, same ol'-same ol'. Anyway, I walk into the room and it's like a freaking funeral in there -- I mean, dead silent. No chatter about the weekend senate softball league games (my guys doubled up Schumer's staff 6-3, BTW), no small talk, nothing.

"Kinda quiet in here this morning," I chuckled, trying to break the ice. Well geez, I swear you'd have thought I had just took a dump on the table. The whole staff started staring down at their shoelaces. Even Jason, the annoying suckup intern from Kankakee who's always reminding me about his law school recommendation letter.

"Okay, who died?" I ask.

Two more minutes of silence. Finally my senior communications aide, Nancy Piotrowski, pipes up, real sheepish-like: "Senator, I think you should see your email inbox."

Okay, I think, some rightwing Dupage County crank sent me a nasty-gram; big whoop. Then I see it. Holy mother of Elvis on a pogo stick, I look at the subject lines and it's like an avalanche of all hatemail -- 'Disgusting,' 'Obscene,' 'Disgraceful,' 'Sick to My Stomach,' blah blah blah. Phone logs and mail, same weird thing.

Read both...


Your Co-Conspirator,
ARC: St Wendeler